When I started asking this question, which eventually became one of The Curiosity Experiment cards, I was starting to notice that talking was one of the ways I burn off my extra energy aka my potential.
Through numerous conversations with my wise other half, Jeff, I became aware of the multitude of ways that I was wasting my energy – energy and focus that could be used to create awesome things, share ideas or serve more people.
In a culture that highly values intellect and our expression of it, we often talk to prove our value, cement who we are and what we believe and to connect. But when we are talking, if we are not paying attention, it often creates distance, not intimacy. Typically we learn that talking equals connection and intimacy, which is in reality, is most often not true.
Intimacy unleashes HUGE potential so I want to explore how to be intimate more often.
So I started asking, “Why am I talking about this?”, throughout the day. I started noticing and still do, how often what I say is unnecessary and how often I am talking to burn off extra energy, NOT to create more potential and intimacy.
Being intimate, connecting more and making a bigger ripple effect is more important than talking to me. Through The Change Militia practices, I am learning to FEEL when I am “TOO” VITALIZED, and might choose to DO SOMETHING to burn off that vitality – like talk a lot. I FEEL discomfort arise and I can choose something that will help me feel at ease and be connected rather than simply alleviate the discomfort. Then I am tapping more of my potential.
DOES THIS SOUND NUTTY? Give it a try. Ask throughout the day, why am I talking about this? Be curious and notice if it is actually a contribution or necessary OR if it just feels good to talk because that is familiar.
Choose to be curious – practices that help you trust and know yourself through experimenting will help you have greater long-term success and fulfillment.